Sunday, January 24, 2010

Back to ONE

Thanks for coming by, what you read in the rest of this lil' note is all masks off, the raw, gritty truth that might sometimes be piercing, but sometimes it's just what we need...and as we dive more and more into God's desires for us, let's take the fullness of His truth, hope and love to the lost, the least and lowly. We hope you discover more of who God is to you as you take it in too, we're learning together!


So today I sat just listening to what Jesus had to say...cause I had realized how much my time spent with God consisted of a to-do list for Him! And what kinda friendship is that!?! I mean I've enjoyed plenty of moments of just worshipping Him, but recently He encouraged me to just sit, be still and rest. And for all who know me, that's kinda hard to do, I think it's honestly hard for any of us to do because our lives are so busy where distractions are at our doorstep as soon as we wake up and we've gotta train ourselves to really "make every effort to enter His rest" as it says in Hebrews 4:11.

So for a while, I'm sitting there and Jesus was pretty quiet, I think He just wanted me to enjoy some silence for a change. Then He broke out and wanted me to pray this over His children: "return us back to one." John 17 popped into my head, the part where He prays for those who'll come to believe in Him. The Father and the Son are one (John 10:30) and they desire their children to be brought into the same union as them (John 17:20-23). He longs to return His children, me included, back into our rightful place of deeper union with Him, that our walk of faith will be about oneness with Him first - above ministry, serving, finances, worldly thinking, job positions, titles, etc. (Gal. 5:6).


He wants to take us back to the first commandment of loving Him will all our hearts, souls and minds, of putting Him before our hunger for greatness, giftings, anointings, selfish ambitions, etc.  Back to the simplicity of just being with Him, walking with Him as Enoch, Moses, Paul, and all those patriarchs did and making room for Him to be with us every second of the day.  And out of this deep union, His love and ministry (prophet, priest, teacher, etc.) will naturally flow out of us and into this hurting world.  And it's true, as I've welcomed Him into more and more of my life every single day, it's been nothing but joy, peace and freedom.

"Nothing Even Matters" by Lauryn Hill was playing in my head the other day. The Holy Spirit often uses songs to get a message across, He's like a jukebox! So He was trying to tell me that in this life, nothing really matters but Him. I was deeply convicted these past two weeks of school because as our leaders spoke on the love of God and our identity in Him, I was broken to know how I found security, acceptance, worth and value in people/things other than Him. How the foundation of my walk with Him was more me trying to serve and please Him and earn His love...or even other people's approval or recognition for that matter. Salvation is a gift, but I know I sometimes live like I need to pay Him back! How I've felt like I needed to make my destiny happen or even how I put ministry before Him, sought after anointings and giftings instead of just seeking Him alone. "Pursue love and eagerly desire spiritual gifts..." 1 Cor 14:1

And trust me, I'm speaking to myself, not to be patted on the back or anything, I'm trying to catch God's heart for all of us. But He wants to return all of us, His children, back into oneness with Him. Where we live out of a place of "He loves me!!!" Where it's not about how well we can love Him, serve Him, please Him with doing good things. Where it's about His overwhelming love for us that meets our deepest needs. "We love because He first loved us," 1 John 4:19.  No matter our past, present, mistakes and sins, He just loves us, we are the joy and inheritance of His suffering (Heb 12:2). I pray we can all learn to live out of His approval, pleasure and acceptance for us and be fulfilled in that.  I ask you the same question that was asked of me, that made me look deep within my heart:
If you were stuck on a deserted island and all you had was Jesus, would He be enough?
                                                                                           
                                                                                                                                  Love,
- tami

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